


One Last Night Before The End

by Sun_Spark



Series: Numb3rs: Colby & David & Demi-Asexual Shenanigans [2]
Category: Numb3rs (TV)
Genre: Angst, Asexual Character, Bisexual David Sinclair, DemiAce, Demisexual Colby Granger, Demisexuality, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s03e24 The Janus List, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Life Partners, M/M, Missing Scene, Partners to Lovers, idk how to tag, the night before
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-26
Updated: 2020-07-26
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:22:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25531285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sun_Spark/pseuds/Sun_Spark
Summary: Missing Scene: The Janus List - Colby knows his name is on that list, and he knows that Kirkland's plan is for him to go to prison with Dwayne, and for all this to happen he has to lose his family and more importantly his partner. He knows what's coming will break him, and David, so he asks Don to give them the night, makes up an excuse, and spends the last night they have savoring their time together, even if his partner doesn't know it.(Emotional) Hurt/Comfort: Colby can't keep his emotions in check, but he can't tell David the truth. David comforts him anyway.Angst: You've seen the episode, yes?
Relationships: Colby Granger/David Sinclair
Series: Numb3rs: Colby & David & Demi-Asexual Shenanigans [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1985776
Comments: 5
Kudos: 13





	One Last Night Before The End

**Author's Note:**

> Some of you about to be real mad at me. This might as well just be called twisting the knife, cause that's what I did.

“Don.” The man in question looked up from the too bitter and just shy of cold coffee he was pouring at the sound of his name and saw Colby leaning in the room, hanging onto the doorframe. “What’s up Colby. When did you get back?”

Colby didn’t react to the second question, hiding the pang it sent through his chest. He’d just come from a discussion with Kirkland, but Don didn’t need to know that. “Little bit ago, the lead didn’t go anywhere. As to what’s up, not much, we don’t have anything new at the moment and we’re still waiting on some info to come in.” There was something off about him but Don couldn’t place it, so he set it aside to deal with later. “Alright, then what is it?” Colby shifted slightly and Don hid a grin with his drink. It was the same shift the man always made when he wanted to be frank but was trying not to come off as an ass challenging authority, it was an adjustment made to compensate for the years in the military. “Listen, man, David hasn’t slept in two days, and I haven’t either, can I please force him to go home and rest?”

He didn’t hide the grin this time. "Yeah alright, just make sure you two princesses are back here in the morning after your beauty rest.” Colby rolled his eyes at the teasing and nodded his thanks as he went.

David was at his desk in their shared cubicle and he looked up as Colby neared, he offered a greeting as he turned back to his files. “Hey Granger, we got anything new on the bugs yet?”

Colby ignored the painful clenching in his chest and shook his head with a neutral expression as he settled on the edge of his partner’s desk easily enough and to the observer, it seemed casual. “No, not yet. Listen, Don wants us to head home, get some rest, and come back in the morning.”

David absentmindedly offered an “Uh-huh.”, already shifting through the next layers of papers. “David, you hear me, man?” No visible response was offered, so he poked him in the shoulder. “Yeah, Granger, just let me finish going through these files, alright?” He looked at the stack and sighed internally. Judging by the size of it, David’s ‘look through’ would take at least another hour.

“David.” Something in Colby’s tone, something too low and too flat, made the man look up and he frowned at what he saw. Colby seemed normal enough to the world, but David knew him better. To his partner the man looked worn down to his limit, he was normally bright and chipper even in the most dire of circumstance, but right now his eyes were dim, betraying something emotionally wrong, enough so that David was concerned. He set the files aside and stood. “Yeah, let’s go home.”

It didn’t take them long to get back to David’s place, there hadn’t been any question that they would stay together tonight as they did most nights, and David’s was closer. Colby’s car pulled in just a moment after David’s jeep and the senior agent let out a deep breath and let his shoulders fall, finally feeling the weight of stress he’d been ignoring ever since Charlie faced off with a bomber and he and his partner had scaled a bridge to be face to face with said explosives.

Once they’d gotten inside they shed their outer layers – shoes by the door and jackets on the hook. Their keys were tossed on the side table with their phones. Suddenly feeling too closed in and wanting to have fewer restrictions David started undoing his tie, Colby, being the rebellious little twit he was, and hating them, rarely wore one. Gentle arms wrapped around David’s middle as Colby laid his head on his shoulder quietly, almost timidly. David responded by resting his head against Colby’s while he finished removing and folding his tie so he could set it down. “You alright Colb?” Task done, he turned in his partner’s arms and returned the embrace. “You’re oddly quiet, Mr.-always-has-a-snarky-comment.” Despite the teasing comment, David’s tone was quiet – They were both tired and he was genuinely concerned at how off his partner’s mood seemed. The so brief you could have missed it tightening of Colby’s arms around him almost desperately didn’t ease that concern at all, but Colby pulled away and offered a small smile. “Yeah, just not feeling great. Tired.”

David frowned but didn’t push the issue. Colby would talk to him when he was ready, or David would push him when there was a problem, but for now, neither of those moments had arrived. “Alright then.” 

He stepped around Colby and headed for the kitchen, calling over his shoulder as he went: “Have you eaten yet?” He offered a sheepish grin around the kitchen archway’s frame before ducking duck around to make tea. “I kind of lost track of you for a few hours.” 

Colby swallowed past the block in his throat and tried very, _very_ hard not to break down right that moment. He couldn’t tell David where he had been for those hours, about his meeting with Kirkland, he couldn’t tell him those things any more than he could tell him about the past five _years_. Oh, how he wished he could. 

“No. No, I haven’t.” He forced some form of his normal self to shine through, refusing to ruin what may well be the last night they had…even if David didn’t know it. So, with a small grin and a forced lightheartedness to his tone, he stepped into the kitchen and leaned against the counter by his partner. “And judging by that question, I’m guessing you spent most of the day working through the case. Did you even have lunch, David?” 

The teasing in his tone came through and David rolled his eyes, pushing him playfully and too gently to be called a shove. “Yes Mom, I did.” Colby swayed with the nonexistent momentum of the nudge while chuckling, holding his hands up at his sides mockingly in surrender. “Alright, alright, no need to get violent!” David was suddenly in his space and Colby laughed in earnest as his partner mumbled “I’ll show you violent.” before proceeding to tickle his sides and lay a few dozen kisses along his jaw and neck. 

Colby pushed at his shoulders without any real force but enough to be felt, play fighting with him and laughing as he arched his neck, notably in no way that made it harder for David to access. “Uncle! Uncle!” The hands at his sides stop their torment and laid flat, holding him gently as David’s head fell to his shoulder, the man’s frame shaking with quiet laughter. After a moment David raised his head and rested his forehead against Colby’s, the two pausing there with their eyes closed, enjoying the peace and each other while they caught their breath. 

“D’you feel like cooking, or y’want to order something?” Colby hummed in response to the question murmured against his cheek, and shook his head ever so slightly as not to displace David. “Order something.” He answered quietly. David gave a small nod and pressed a chaste kiss to the corner of his mouth before pulling back and turning away to grab their takeout menus by the microwave. 

“The usual Chinese?”

Colby could have thrown up from the sudden sour twisting in his stomach, and he was glad his partner’s back was to him so the sick look on his face didn’t give him away. Swallowing heavily and willing the bile to go back down his esophagus, he took a deep breath and tried to maintain a steady tone as he choked out an answer. “Rather not.”

It must have sounded relatively normal to David because the man did not turn around with concern nor questions, merely shuffled through the small collection of pamphlets with an absentminded nod. “Alright. You don’t like Italian, so there’s Thai, Ethiopian, or the Greek place we haven’t tried?” He looked up at Colby questioningly and the man breathed a sigh of relief when nothing more than drawn brows followed, apparently, his inner turmoil wasn’t written across his face. “Thai?”

David nodded and set the other pamphlets down. “You want your usual Colb?” Colby nodded, the tension slowly running out of his shoulders at the normalcy. “Sounds good.” David nodded one last time and picked up the phone, gesturing to the hallway with it while he dialed. “Why don’t you go get changed while I order?”

Glad for the escape and the time to compose himself Colby nodded and pushed away from the counter, heading for the archway. David grabbed him gently as he went by with an arm around his waist and pulled him close, moving his arm up so he could cup the side of Colby’s head with his hand, pressing their temples together in a brief embrace before letting him go. Colby offered a small smile as he went, saying nothing as the phone rang.

He let the smile fall as he walked down the hallway to David’s, honestly their, bedroom, shutting the door behind him quietly. He stood there for a moment, slumped back against the door, and for a handful of seconds, allowed the turmoil in his chest to consume him. Grief, Pain, Nausea, Tears, Dread, Anger, Fear, Resentment, Sorrow, and Love so all-encompassing it hurt, it along with the crushing knowledge that he would soon lose that love. 

It was only a matter of days, and he knew it. Kirkland had told him that the only conceivable plan that could work was if he was arrested and placed in prison with Dwayne for however long it took for Dwayne’s contacts to make plans to get them out. Hopefully - and damn it Colby was going to learn to hate that word – Hopefully, it didn’t take too long, maybe a few weeks or months. Months. In a prison. In a hellhole that would be worse than normal given his ‘past’ as a Fed. He could live with that, but he didn’t have to like it. 

Five years. Five years he had been living through paranoia, threats, injuries, cutting contact with his family, and never-ending isolation just to get this scumbag: The Mole in the DOJ. He could appreciate the complexities of governments, and the reality that none of them were clean nor deserved real loyalty, but then again he wasn’t doing this out of loyalty to a government. No, he was doing this for two reasons: One – He owed a life debt to Dwayne Carter, and playing this game, giving him a chance at getting out alive and free, was the only way he could repay him. And two – The information the Mole was after would get people killed, dozens if not hundreds of innocent people, not just soldiers but also civilians, killed. That was why he was still going through with this, why he had been dreading something like this for five years.

He hated this, and he hated Dwayne for getting him into this. If he was truthful, he hated himself too, for what his actions, necessary or not, were going to do to the people he had come to love, his found family. He had asked Kirkland, begged him, to be allowed to tell just one of them, to tell his partner what was coming. He’d pleaded to be allowed to confide in the man, to give him the comfort he owed him for what was coming. Even if it was just to tell him something vague, not even the truth of the last five years, but anything at all to explain what was going to happen. But he couldn’t, and he’d known that already. Still, he’d had to try, to hope against hope that maybe the answer would be yes, because he knew that when the false information dropped it would tear his partner’s heart out and gut his family. He knew that beyond questioning the man he’d worked with as a partner for three years, David was going to question the person he’d lived with as his partner in home and heart, and Colby wasn’t going to be there to reassure him that that man was real, that that love and trust was real.

He wasn’t sure if he would be able to mend the damage, even if the lie was kept for only a week, and he knew it would be longer. If he backed out, he’d owe a life debt still, and hundreds of people could be killed because of his unwillingness to do this. It was too late anyway, his name was on that list and he knew it was only a matter of time until they found it. 

He wanted to collapse and sob, or throw up so this feeling wasn’t contained to his stomach anymore, he wanted to scream in frustration and anger and helplessness, he wanted….he wanted to lie to himself and pretend this wasn’t happening because he knew he couldn’t stop it. But he’d be lucky if he got another night with his partner and lover, and he didn’t want to destroy what was likely the last they would have by failing to contain the turmoil inside himself. So, he pushed away from the door, gathered his pajamas, changed into them, folded his day clothes and placed them on the dresser, and valiantly ignored the clock ticking away the seconds of this night in the back of his mind.

He sat on the bed and scrubbed a hand over his face, attempting to wipe it, and any tears that may have escaped, away. He’d composed himself just in time too, as he heard the doorknob turn and looked up to see David stepping into the room with a gentle smile directed at him. “Hey.”

He grinned a bit crookedly back at him, “Hey yourself.”

David shook his head with a gentle snort and let the door fall shut behind him as he made his way towards the dresser. “Food’s ordered, should be about fifteen minutes if their track record holds. In the meantime, I’m going to get changed.”

“Okay.” He didn’t say more as he laid back on the bed and crossed an arm over his eyes, leaving the other thrown out to his side. He was sure most people would have watched, and most people would have been lucky to be allowed, but being Demi/Asexual as he was, that didn’t really do it for him. True his partner was beautiful, and normally Colby would gladly watch and appreciate that beauty, but tired and stressed as he was, he was content to simply bask in his partner’s presence.

He didn’t open his eyes, or rather peek one eye out from under his arm, until he felt David nudging him gently, standing between his knees. He peered up at him lazily and David grinned, holding out his hands for Colby to take, once he had his partner pulled him into a sitting position and settled his hands on his shoulders. It was a tad awkward on Colby’s neck to look up at the man, but they were far enough apart it didn’t hurt, so he settled there comfortably, loosely stringing his arms around David’s waist and humming happily when he felt a hand petting through his hair. “You’re a bit worn out Colby?”

He dropped his head forward onto the man’s stomach, mindful to be gentle and not to hurt his partner, and gave a small grunt in response. David didn’t push him and Colby took a moment to take a few deep, calming breaths before answering fully. “Yeah, I don’t feel great. I just want to eat, do nothing, and spend the night together.” 

David bent over and he felt a firm kiss press against the top of his head, a gesture of comfort before he stood straight again. “Then that’s what we’ll do, okay? We’ll eat and then we’ll lay down.” He hummed and took a steadying breath before pulling back and peering up at his partner through slightly unfocused eyes. “Sounds good.”

It was at that moment that the doorbell rang and David treated him with a parting kiss to his forehead before going to answer it. Force of habit made him listen for any commotion or sounds of distress, but all he heard was the all too common sounds of their food being delivered and the small talk David was having with the person who brought it. He sighed quietly and pulled himself to his feet, determined to set it, all of it, as out of mind as he could and focus on his partner for the next few hours. Wandering into the kitchen he found said partner already splitting the food they ordered onto a pair of plates and grinned, rolling his eyes. 

“You could have come get me to help.” He said it teasingly, already moving to grab a pair of cups and fill them with tea. David returned the grin over his shoulder, “Not a difficult job Colby.” Colby just shook his head, both of them knowing that wasn’t the point, and dropped a kiss on David’s shoulder with a quiet “Thank you.” as he carried the drinks towards the living room. He settled on the couch and David carried their plates in a moment later, setting them on the coffee table and setting himself next to Colby. 

“Do you want to watch something?” Colby shrugged in response. “You choose.” David eyed him a bit oddly at the lack of banter over their shows and which ones were worth watching and which weren’t, but stood and walked over to the TV set without a word. Kindly, he chose something he knew they would both enjoy rather than one of his own favorites that Colby would not have. He sat back down and enjoyed the sight of Colby’s grin as the theme for the old Star Trek show started playing. Colby settled into his side and nudged his shoulder with his nose, a common affectionate gesture for him, gaze remaining on the old show. He grinned while he grabbed his plate, pulling his legs under himself and leaning into David’s side. “This has got to be one of the goofiest shows ever made.”

David smiled. “It is. But it is the reason we have Next Gen, Enterprise, and the reboots, among all the other series and movies.” He took a bite of his food. “Plus, it’s not that bad.” Colby snorted but didn’t comment.

Dinner took them about as long as the episode did, and by the time it had ended David was at least slightly confident that his partner was a bit happier, but even then he could still see the edges of something pulling at the man. He debated asking if he wanted to watch another show, but judging by the way Colby was pressing into his side while trying not to disrupt him, he figured it would be better to get them into bed. It wasn’t unusual for Colby to press close to David, in fact, he often deferred to physical affection before verbal as it came more naturally to him, but this was different. The force with which Colby was pressing into him, while not painful, was more than normal, he almost wanted to call it desperate when one took into account the way Colby was hugging himself and the general muted state he’d been in all evening. So, he set his cup down next to their stacked plates and turned towards his partner.

“Bed?” 

Colby gave him a small, lazy smile. “Yeah. That sounds good.”

David nodded and leaned his head forward to nudge Colby’s nose with his own, eliciting the single soft, breath filled laugh he was hoping for. “Why don’t you go get settled? I’ll put the dishes in the sink and we can deal with them in the morning.”

Two lazy arms looped around his neck in a light hug as Colby dropped his head, nudging at David’s neck. “Okay.” Placing a light kiss there, he unwound himself as easily as he’d settled and disappeared into the bedroom. David followed him after cleaning up and checking the lock on the door, finding his partner sitting in bed and absently staring at the wall with an expression that seemed blank but betrayed something darker underneath. He stopped just before the bed, watching his partner with concern.

“Colby? Are you alright?”

The blonde looked up at him with a furrowed brow and sad eyes. Quietly, almost sadly he answered: “I don’t want to lie to you David.”

David frowned, worry coloring his features. “Then don’t Baby.”

Colby’s eyes fell shut and a pained expression crossed his face. He ducked his head, swallowing hard against the pain lodged there. Finally, he settled on the most honest answer he could give, but nowhere near the answer he wanted to give. “No. I’m not alright, and I don’t think I’m going to be alright for a while.” Hazel eyes that shifted from honey brown to sea glass green met his own, betraying the weight of something David couldn’t name. “But I don’t want you to worry about me, and I don’t want to upset or hurt you.” He sighed, shoulder’s slumping as he rubbed at the bridge of his nose for a moment. Sensing he wasn’t finished, David didn’t say anything, and sure enough, those sea glass eyes met his own a second later. “I just want to lay in this bed, curled up with my partner, and pretend the rest of the world doesn’t exist.”

It didn’t negate his concern, but if holding his partner and comforting him would help whatever was going on in his head or out there in the world that David didn’t know about… “Okay.”

He kissed him as he climbed on the bed, settling on his side of their shared space on his back but still turned towards his partner. Colby followed him easily, turning with him and laying down next to him. David broke away long enough to pull the blankets up to their waists, laying back down and opening his arms to the other. He’d been right about the desperation behind Colby’s earlier pressing into his side, if the way Colby’s legs immediately tangled tightly with his own, his chest flush to David’s side, arms wrapped firmly around his stomach, and his head tucked close under David’s chin were anything to judge by. 

David, his range of motion effectively limited, began rubbing soothing lines up and down Colby’s spine, carding his fingers through his hair with the other hand. He would have stayed there, unknowing of what was wrong but happy to provide comfort, but then he felt a warm dampness seeping through his thin T-shirt. 

“Colby…?” He questioned softly, not wanting to jar the man. The answer was an immediate tensing of Colby’s arms and legs squeezing him gently but tightly while the man pressed into him with his whole body. 

David’s stomach twisted a bit. It was highly unusual for Colby to cry, and David could count on less than two hands how many times he’d seen it. The man tended to grit his teeth and bury everything under a cloying layer of ‘what needs to be done, needs to be done and everything else doesn’t matter’, including the effect it had on him. That he was nearly silent and still even now when only a few moments worth of tears had soaked through David’s shirt to his skin was both telling and worrying. 

He ran his fingers through Colby’s hair a few more times before gently cupping the side of his jaw and carefully urging him to look up. Colby’s head tilted up and their eyes met, David nearly winced. Though there were relatively few tears running down Colby's face, his eyes were telling. They turned completely brown when he was angry, bright sea glass green when he was happy or excited, and every shade in between for every little event and emotion throughout the days. But most unfairly, they only turned to this particular shade, the shade of green found not in sea glass but in the deep waters and algae blooms, when sorrow had engulfed the man’s heart. It was a beautiful color, among the most entrancing Colby’s eyes would turn, mesmerizing and endless, but David’s heart hurt to see it.

He used his thumb to wipe away the tears on Colby’s cheek gently. “What is it, Baby?” He uttered softly, desperately wanting to know what was hurting his lover so he could help, or at least comfort him properly, but afraid of speaking too loudly or too harshly for fear of pushing him away.

Colby’s eyes fell shut as a few new tears fell. He shook his head slowly. “I don’t want to talk about it.” He whispered, more than loud enough to be heard. Swallowing past his tears he told the truth, this one that he could. “I _can’t_ talk about it.” His voice choked off at the end and he dropped his forehead to David’s chest, rocking his head back and forth lightly. 

“It’s okay, you don’t have to Colb.” David would have let it drop there and spent the remaining waking hours comforting the man, but his partner raised his head and met his eyes with an alarming level of intensity and gentleness that should not be mixing. Though it was little more than a whisper, quiet, slow and timid, the near panic lancing through it made David feel as if he had been punched in the gut. “I need you to know that I love you.”

They said it often enough in the privacy of their homes, away from prying eyes and listening ears, but this was not so much a declaration as it was a desperate plea to be heard. David just didn’t know why. He knew Colby loved him, surely Colby realized that? 

Colby had laid further down the bed than David, the easier to wrap his entire body around his partner, but he wasn’t so far down that it was any great difficulty for David to bow his head and kiss him, gentle and just shy of desperate. He didn’t go far when he pulled away, merely enough to look at him. “I know, Colb. I’m not gonna forget that.”

A low, sad whine escaped from Colby’s throat and David pressed the hand resting in his hair against his scalp just a little more firmly, trying to ground him. Though he kept his tone gentle and his voice soft, he made sure the next words out of his mouth were firm. “I know you love me, Colby, I haven’t doubted that. And I love you too, Baby, that’s not going to change.”

A sad smile played over Colby’s features as his tear-filled eyes refused to meet David’s. “Maybe…” It was a whisper but David heard it. He sighed quietly and carded his hand through Colby’s hair a few times, he then hooked the side of his thumb under the man’s jaw and gently raised his head to face him before turning that hand to cup the man’s jaw and cheek. Colby shifted against him in response and raised the arm he’d had across David’s stomach to cup his hand around the back of his neck, fingers absentmindedly stroking the smooth dark skin there.

David offered him a smile and turned his head to press a light kiss to the wrist now hovering next to his jaw. The action earned him a small upturn at the corner of Colby’s mouth and that was good enough. He turned back to Colby and met his eyes, making sure he held his attention. “Whatever’s going on, we’ll get through it, Colby, I promise.”

The man gave him a sad, tearful, but genuine smile. “I hope so.” 

They didn’t talk further on whatever it might be – David unknowing but only seeing his partner’s pain, and Colby knowing but unable to say anything and fearing the pain he was going to both cause and feel. Perhaps both feeling the inevitable coming, no matter their understanding of it or lack thereof, they stayed awake as long as they could, long past the faded twilight of L.A. and into the night hours. Colby, despite being Demi/Ace did enjoy his partner physically, but they weren’t in a particularly playful mood, and so did nothing particularly _fun_. Instead, they passed the time trading gentle kisses, affectionate caresses, and soft words of love and reassurance. David more than willing to provide comfort and affection to his partner, reassuring him that everything would be alright, and Colby returning that affection desperately and begging whatever beings resided in the heavens that those reassurance would be true.

Colby Granger was arrested the next day. And while he sat across from his former boss and friend and confessed a crime he didn’t really commit, he felt himself die inside. He couldn’t look David Sinclair in the eye as the man’s world shattered, nor could he stand up and gather him into his arms and promise him it would be okay, just like they said. He couldn’t let anyone see as his own heart shattered and stopped beating, and he wasn’t allowed to loose the scream of agony stuck in his throat or the let the tears pressing at his eyes fall – He could only sit there and play the part he was given. He watched helplessly as his family fell apart and lied, ironically for the first time in three years he really, truly lied. 

He died sitting in that chair. Without a family waiting for him, a home to come back to, without his partner… what did he have? Nothing. He was once again just a soldier, doing his duty, damn the consequences for him.

He only hoped that at some point in the following weeks or months that his partner would see the truth in what he had told him their last night, and he would, sometimes, in the cramped darkness of his prison cell, allow himself to dream of being allowed to come home.

**Author's Note:**

> I would love to know what you thought, so please leave kudos and comment - I try to always answer comments eventually. <3


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